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Sunday Soliloquy: What’s In A Blame? August 22, 2010

It was all Eve's Fault

Blaming is often a mechanism for escaping responsibility.

“I didn’t do it.”

He did.

There is no denying that with Barack Obama as our president, blaming has become quite an art form of late.

When executed with Ginsu knife precision and flair, one has to admire a good blame game when they see one.

This is not a game for the solitary.

Because someone else’s reputation is involved, the blame game requires at least two players: the blamer and the blamie. It is the blamer’s role to assert that ownership of the problem lies with the blamie.

There is nothing original about this game.

When God asked Adam why he was ashamed of his nakedness and what was up with the new fig leave fashion statement, he blamed Eve hence the first recorded “blamie” was in fact a women. Adam blamed Eve because it was she that was tempted by the serpent to eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge. Eve then gave the fruit to Adam to partake of and being a trusting man just trying to please a demanding woman – he ate it. And there you have it folks, everything in the entire universe that is wrong is because of women. Now this is the blame game according to men. A more logical perspective would be that Adam had a mind of his own and did not have to eat the damned piece of fruit but being hungry and expecting a woman to wait on him hand and foot, he was too lazy to get his own food. Eve being nice and nurturing offered the fruit to him and Adam ate it of his own will. It was Adam’s fault for eating the fruit, not Eve’s.

Just as George W. Bush did not make Barack Obama eat of the tree of presidential responsibility.

Barry gobbled down those apples of responsibility all on his own.

He craved them.

He lied for them.

He even kicked a woman’s ass for them.

Hillary wanted to climb that tree but Barry pulled her down by the seat of her orange pantsuit and made it to the top beating on his chest like King Kong on the Empire State Building.

“I AM THE CHOSEN ONE” he yelled  from the MLK like mountaintops of the Styrofoam Greek Temples.  Yes Obama was the chosen one and everything from there on out was Bush’s fault.

Proof that centuries later after Eve forced that fruit down Adam’s mouth, the blame game is still a viable part of a man’s defense arsenal.Sure the fig leaf once covering his nuts have turned into a Burberry Suit but the sentiment of the blame game remains the same.
I will revisit  Barry the Blamer later.

My point is that the practice of blaming is well documented throughout history dating as far back as the creation of man and the presidency of the United States.

Even my mother practiced the blame game quite religiously.

My grandfather was credited with ruining her entire life. Mother made this declaration when I was six years old. That made her 37 at the time which I guess is a great age to determine that your life is ruined.

Explaining the absence of granddad’s defense was easy. He was dead and buried in a Chicago cemetery since 1973. I had only met him once when my brother took me to his home without mother’s knowledge because she had refused to speak to the man since 1968. My brother idolized his granddad, he was his first grandchild. However, my mother did not share the same emotions and was closer to her mother who reportedly left the abusive man during the 1950’s.

My brother being born in the middle of grandparents divorce profited somewhat from their competition for his loyalty. By the time lil’ ol’ Afrocity came along fifteen years and nine grandkids later, the novelty had passed and so had granddad. All I was left with were stories of how horrid he was.

Definitions of horrid ranged from his putting his steel toed black work boots in my mom’s butt to not allowing my grandmother to leave him with her eight children. Grandma left her kids behind under the threat of my knife wielding grandfather.

Eight kids ranging from 17 to 2 years of age. Eight kids who later would never agree on who was who in the which parent ruined our lives blame game. For the first five siblings, granddad was the consummate orge. Black migrant from Mississippi to Chicago, hardworking on the railroad, hardworking to keep his wife barefoot and pregnant. My mother was her fourth child at 27 years of age and she would bare five more within eight years.

I found this great drawing about weight gain blame.

As a husband, he was neglectful at best, as a father he was the meanie who savored WWII rationed sugar products in front of his salivating offspring. “He enjoyed every drop of ice cream,” my mother would recall. “We would ask him ‘Daddy can I have sum?’ and he would laugh in our faces, sometimes teasing us with a spoonful then take it away just as our tongues would hit it.”

The question remains, was my mother telling the truth? How would I ever know since I was not a witness? I can attest to the strange behavior on the part of my aunts and uncles when it came to ice cream. They never shared and acted as though a pint of butter pecan ice milk was the last source of food on God’s earth.

Mother did share her sweets with me but as a sibling group there was something going on with frozen confections and past trauma. Ice Cream was a symbol of something forbidden and whenever she could, mother had our fridge stockpiled with the tasty stuff.   She blamed ice cream for her battles with weight gain.  So was this my grandfather’s fault somehow because he abused her by denying ice cream -causing her to load up on it in adulthood thus ruining her life?    I would answer “no” but mother would constantly defend her ice cream binges by educating me on the psychological need to satiate what her father had cruelly kept from her.

The justification for blaming my  mother’s ice cream obsession on her dad  is not readily apparent when you look at her younger siblings.  They possess the same ice cream obsession yet paint my grandmother as the evil woman who abandoned them to live a thrilling life as a single maid.   “She had it good,” one aunt would tell me. “She just left us and was very selfish.”

Ah, but granny did not deny ice cream. To date there are no granny ice cream Nazi stories that have surfaced.

So who is to blame for ruining the kids lives?

Who is telling the truth?  The older siblings or the younger siblings?  If the latter were in diapers as their mother abandoned them would they really know if it was at knife point or of her own accord?

You be the blaming judge.

Now back to Barry the Blamer.

What are we going to about this kid who can’t seem to fess up to anything?

You just say “No, no no!!! NO!”

Just say NO to Barry the Blamer and his bunch of Bush  blaming bandits.  Obamabots dimiss any resposibilty assigned to Obama.  That is their campaign strategy going into the November midterm elections.  Do not let them get away with it.

But dear Nancy, didn’t the American people elect you and Barack Obama to make the problems go away?  I take it that your intellectually grounded argument is that they are still Bush’s problems if the Democrats are too incompetent to make the problems vanish?  So you were elected not to actually fix the problems that Bush left behind (which I am not denying that Bush left some big problems)but the Democrats were elected so the electorate could make dams sure that we had someone to blame?

Now nearly two years after Barry has been elected we have no solutions, no hope, no change and nothing but blame.

My strongest reaction to this, is to remind the Democrats that Obama wanted this job. He was elected by nearly 65 million voters because he said he would change things not blame things.  If we were to put up with four more years of this what would we get?  More of the same problems only with the unclear demarcation of whose responsibility it is to fix them.

Thus an enraged, over taxed, under employed America should not care that Obama is doing nothing but exacerbating the debt by spending more because he is not an evil Republican…like Bush.  In sum, no American would ever want to vote Republican again because Bush, a Republican, got us into this mess.


Such an assumption is one sure way to lose an election.

The Democrats were guilty of this faulty “they would never trust Republicans again” thinking when Carter was running against Ronald Reagan.  What works for one election cycle does not necessarily work for another.  Even when voters are leery of a party due to past mismanagement, history has proven that they somehow get over it within four years.  Just long enough for the Republicans to get a message out that resonates with what voters want to hear.

No one need  worry about your political party when you are actually fixing problems.  At the end of the day, a man wants a roof over his head, food on his table  and a pot to piss in.  If that roof and  pot comes from an elephant rather than a donkey, I am sure there are some Americans who would not blink an eye while taking it.

Sure Obama play the blame game.  It is as old as time itself.

As for the consequences, do be warned that while the game is old and has many players, like any game it also has losers.

Today the losers are the American people.

In 2010 and 2012 it may be your band of followers and YOU.

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