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Catty Corner: How Liberal Women Get Skin In The Game November 17, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — afrocity @ 11:03 AM
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Can someone please tell me why Tina Fey cannot seem to keep Sarah Palin’s name out of her mouth?  Could it be because she is desperately in need of attention despite having 30 Rock be a hit?  Could it be that she needs a personality?

After all if you Google “Tina Fey” and look for images, all you will mostly find is Tina’s bony ass posing in provocative tiny leg showing outfits.  Obviously, Tina really wants you to dog ear every page of a magazine she appears in. ” Wow, that Tina Fey is funny and sexy” she wants you to say.   However, we seem to have an epic fail here because all I see when

I look at Tina Fey is a confident-less woman who feels physically unattractive and uninteresting so she needs to bare as much skin as she can in every magazine and attempt to ridicule a woman (Sarah Palin)  over and over and over and over and over and over and over again, so she be the cool girl on the block.

It is also an amusing irony that Ms. Fey authored the screenplay Mean Girls.  Obviously something she knows a lot about.  We all remember mean girls in our lives.  One of mine was named “Ronetta”.  She was a heartless bitch who lived most of her high school life in the principals office.  She dressed well, wore too much make-up but didn’t we all at that age???

Some were more forgiving of Ronetta slathering deep red lipstick on her huge square shaped lips than she was forgiving of myself and other girls doing nothing besides going to class and breathing.   A rare exception it was indeed for Ronetta to pass me in the hallway and not roll her eyes.  This girl was a junior mind you and I was  a peasant freshman- why did she care about me?   The worse day came during 8th period study hall which was held in the school lunchroom.    Innocently, I was sitting with a friend talking about boys, Duran Duran- not studying- who did in study hall?

You could hear Ronetta and her band of assholes in the background- loud cackling- sitting on the lunch tables – not at them.

“Why are they so loud?”  my friend asked.

“You mean why are black people so loud?”  I asked back jokingly.

Nodding, my friend replied “I so wanted to say that.”


Further Example of Catty Liberal

I just shrugged my shoulders and shook my head.   Somehow Ronetta’s evil radar picked up on us and she started in on me.

“Look at that bitch over there with the purple eyeshadow.”

Suddenly everything was quiet as Ronetta’s lackeys obeyed the queen bee and hum buzzed to my table.

I would be lying if I said I was not afraid.  I would be lying even more if I said I did not want to be invisible.

“This heifer looks like Nancy Reagan with the eyeshadow.”

Laughter erupted throughout the lunchroom, rivaling the sound of Mount Saint Helen.

“Look at her fizzy wuzzy nappy ass hair.”

By now you are asking Afrocity “what did you do?”.

The answer is – nothing.

Because my mother always taught me to ignore bullies, I usually just walked away from threatening situations .  In this case, I could not. I sat there without a hall pass to escape.   The bell literally saved me as the bitch crew scurried off to their next adventure of  wreaking  torment.

That day would go down as one of the worst in my high school history.  Today, I would not handle it that way.   A transformation came over me in college.  I developed a “back off gene”.   What happened to my mean girl?   I have only seen a picture of her but she still slathers red lipstick over her ugly square lips and looks FAT.

Mean girls may turn into mean women but inside there is still a whiny person screaming for attention at the expense of someone else.

Not all women follow the path of liberalism.  To Tina Fey and other liberal loudmouths like Rosie O’Donnell and Joy Behar, that is a sin against women.   Gee Rosie and Joy,  what disconnected names for two women who are so obnoxious.

Sadly, Tina actually got slight applause before she ruined her gratitude to Sarah with her further comments. What a missed opportunity of true grace and class.  Tina could have stood up for all women.

But I suppose she feels that Jerry Brown beating Meg Whitman was good for all women because Meg was a whore.  Or that Sarah Palin losing in 2008 was good for all women because she was a cunt.  Obama is good for all women because he calls us “sweetie”.

From I own the World

Much has been made of PBS cutting some of her speech, which I find ironic because had she been a conservative woman, Anderson Cooper would have no problem with cutting off her head let alone a speech  How dare you deprive everyone of the full experience of Tina’s anti-Palin rant?  Palin is like Marilyn Monroe to these women but what makes them hate her more is that Sarah ain’t no candle in the wind.

This is all pretty pathetic but not as pathetic as Tina Fey.  Her behavior actually further dumbs her down and really only makes her look like someone who owes her fame to a woman that she agrees on nothing with.  Hmmm,  now if I disliked a person so much why would I give them so much importance in my life?

Tina was your career nothing before Sarah Palin came along?

Sarah and her 5 million viewers want to know, and like you Tina- your material is getting OLD.  Time to find another target- one who gives a damn.  Wasn’t there a moment when Tina said that she was glad McCain lost the election so she would not have to “play” Sarah again???


 

Well Tina, America helped you “be done playing this woman”…Now what is your excuse.

Just pathetic mean girl with nothing else to do with her life?

Autographed Letter Signed,

AFROCITY


 

Medical Misogyny: A Cut Above The Rest September 28, 2010

Georgia Cattle Queen, elected by the Georgia Cattlemen's Association, talking with Democratic members of the Georgia House of Representatives in the House chambers.

As if it wasn’t bad enough that I had endured the morning without deodorant,  Chicago was boasting an unseasonable 86 degree temperature in of all times the middle of September.

I crawled from my traffic stuck Moroccan chauffeured  taxicab, and struggled past a group of anti-Bush protesters. Yes anti-Bush.

Now that Obama is president and George W.  is back in Texas,  the IMPEACH BUSH signs have insanely transformed  into INDICT BUSH signs . Tie Dyed tunics and White people with dreadlocks are always a sign of moonbats for me- I had to move fast,  running late for a medical appointment.

Once I arrived sweaty and  frazzled at my destination, I was greeted with a smile, some insurance forms and an offer of wrapped Ghirardelli chocolate squares or Nespresso coffees. Politely, I declined, the pleasantries of the peach and sage green wallpapered office failed to mask the austerity of my situation. As I pumped from the hand sanitizer on the receptionist desk, I had no idea what I would be in store for that day as a woman.


Political party affiliation aside, one ritual all women seem to share is the face grimacing and “God please let this be over” prayers whispered during a mammogram.

My first which I am describing in this post, was two weeks ago. I was a year overdue.
My gynecologist scolded me verbally “self exams are not enough,” she warned. “You are two months past 41 – time to do it annually now.”

“But…but there is no history of breast cancer in my family.” I protested. “Can’t I wait until 45. I eat lots of soy.“
“…and you want to stay breast cancer free don’t you???”

All of the preparative girl talk mammogram horror stories in the world could not describe my true feeling as the nice but relentless four foot eleven-ish medical assistant plopped my left breast on a cold metal slab like a piece of meat and I watched a closing wall and increasing digital numbers squeeeeeeeeeezeeeeee until my brown face turned blue.

“Tell me if it hurts,” she chimed. She was too damn happy for me. Smiling while inflicting pain should be illegal.

It does hurt, but let me guess,  if I told you the truth  you will keep doing it anyway, I thought.

Instead I smiled back and lied, ” No, it’s fine.”  THANK YOU MA’AM CARE TO CRANK IT UP SOME MORE???

That piercing sound the machine made when the picture was being taken – like music to my ears.

“Turn to the side dear,” she instructed. “Bend your knees some.”

Turn to left, right, gee all we needed was me holding some board with my name on it and we have a mug shot.

Every year for the rest of my life I will have to do this because I am woman.

I wondered if men have to go through something similar? Yes prostate gland checks they endure, but do men have to submit to a machine that squeezes their testicles sideways and top to bottom in a way that make them feel like pancakes?

Speaking of which, my breasts could have used a pat of butter and some whipped cream, and maple syrup by the end of the procedure. I re-gowned and slowly walked to the locker room.
“Don’t put your clothes on yet, honey,” the technician said. “The doctor will review your results and if I made a mistake you may have to have it done again.”
Great !!! More torture in the name of cancer prevention.  I bet a man invented that boob presser machine.

Take a wrench and twist my nipples off why don’t you? Saute me, make a patty melt!

Peta ad- which while it promotes kindness to animals, does not look very kind to women.

The waiting room had two more patients awaiting slaughter when I sat back down.  Each woman  had this look of dread as they flipped through the predictable periodical selections. Good Housekeeping, Parent Magazine, In Style, People, US.

Who buys this stuff?

Of course every woman wants to read the latest on Lindsey Lohan  and know exactly how to make the perfect autumn wreath made of cloves before she gets sliced and diced.

You never go to a waiting room for women and see Money magazine, Fortune, Wired or the Economist.

I just had a mammogram and damn-it I need to read a magazine to forget what just happened to me in that torture chamber they call a doctor’s office…Is there a recipe in that magazine for pressed Afrocity breast with braised leeks?

Oops my name was called, the doctor wanted to see me.  Ah, great it was a he.

“Your breasts look great!”  the doctor said with this big smile that I wanted to slap off his face. ” …No lumps, you obviously work out…” He went on about the digital technology of the photographs, and on, and on….and on.

Getting serious for a moment, I thought of my mother.  She only had one mammogram in her entire life and that was after she fell on her breast at the age of 54.  Later bloody discharge was noticed and she went for two months in fear until a neighbor took her to a free clinic.  All was well, she had just injured some tissue.  Her mammogram should no signs of cancer. She never went back again, lived to be 68- cancer free but killed by another misogynistic woman claiming disease- high blood pressure- breast cancer’s silent relative.

Explaining to the doctor that I once had a benign cyst, found by ultrasound some years ago,  I began to let go of the sarcasm and grasp the reality my good fortune.  My career allows me to have health insurance- reliable health insurance.  This doctor was of my own choosing. The medical technology is state of the art.  My hospital ranks among the best in the nation according to U.S. News and World Reports.

“No sign of any cysts now.” he assured.

Looking at the cloud like  images of  my breasts,  I could see no imperfections but I needed to be sure- really sure. “Are you positive because at the time it was rather large about 2 centimeters and they never aspirated it-“

“No you are fine,” he again assured me.” Keep doing your self exams…see you next year.”

I nodded “See you next year. Thank you.”

My soft clothes were so much more comfortable that that Japanese styled wrap gown. I had even brought my own deodorant and even though the med-tech told me they would supply me with some, I was glad to have my own.   Ah, clothes on, no more perspiration, my dignity as a woman was restored or so I thought.
My mammogram was over but the pesky anti-Bush protest was not. Patience Afrocity, your breasts just survived a medical industry made steamroller, you can do it. Moonbat screeching surrounded me. Come on Afrocity there is only about 100 of them …
“Tax the rich motherfuckers”
“IRAQ WAS A FUCKING LIE”
“INDICT BUSH, FUCK SARAH PALIN, FUCK MICHELLE BACHMAN, FUCK MEG WHITMAN”

Gee that’s a lot of fucking. For an anti-Bush rally this was shaping up to be more of an anti-conservative women rally. Bush was just a front for women bashing and many of the protesters were taking part in it… Sad.

Before I went home, the pain from the mammogram worsened.  A big contributor was the large bag of groceries I had picked up along my way.  Not a good idea Afrocity.  Wobbling down the sidewalk, two men in front of me were oblivious of my swift walking breast hurting self.  Seeing that they would not move for me, I slowed behind them and listened to their conversation.

It was about a typical male subject- women and sex.   One man was younger than the older who was about 50- something.

“I tell you,”  the older man said to the younger. “there is nothing better than a pretty woman who cannot speak English.”

My feet stopped walking, I needed a rest from the grocery bag and the sexism. No longer wanting to share aura space with someone who would make such a cruel comment, I let the two men walk a half block in front of me.

His moronic implication was simple:  A non English speaking woman is nothing.  Only there for his consumption. Just use her and like meat she would not be able to talk back in way that her needs would be understood or met.

Those words almost hurt more than my mammogram.

My arms rested, I began to carry on. The men were not  too far ahead of me. Every thought of his misogyny made me want to catch up to them even more.

Hmmm,  a bag full of groceries, painful breasts,  and two meat-heads in plain sight.   Dr. Afrocity Lecter was in the mood for a nice bottle of Chianti and some fava beans.  She walked ever so slowly and quietly…little were they aware of her cannibalistic presence. …

Autographed Letter Signed,

AFROCITY

 

Sarah-cuda, Portrait of A Conservative Lady August 26, 2010

The turn of the political season and the months that follow up until November will pose a number of challenges for our dear Democrats. Times are a-changing for the merchants of hope and change.  Barack Obama has a low approval rating which makes him virtually a cripple when it comes to actually helping his party campaign.  How ironic is that statement he made on the Jay Leno show about the “Special Olympics”  now?

See, you should watch what you say about others. You just may end up in their predicament someday.  Now who is racing to the political finish line in a broken down economic wheelchair?

While many Democrats are fearful of November, there are an equal number of Republican incumbents who are fearful now.  Fearful of losing their own state primaries to Tea Party candidates…Especially Tea Party canidates endorsed by Sarah Palin.  If the Republicans have proven anything in the last week, it is that the Democrats are in trouble and Sarah Palin’s reputation as a conservative powerhouse is firmly established.

Like it or not, Sarah Palin is not going anywhere and no one in their right conservative mind would want her to.  To some degree I am almost happy that Sarah relinquished her position as governor of Alaska.  She did everything she said she would do after resigning.

How rare is that in politics?  She promised to keep the frivolous liberal moonbat anti-Palin  law suits away from the Alaskan people and to be more effective on the stump for the party. Sarah was truthful on both accounts.

Even Charles Krauthammer of Fox News had to recognize that he underestimated Sarah Palin.  The “hammer” is almost never wrong.  Indeed in 2008 when McCain was defeated by Obama, Palin’s critics– her male critics especially– said she was the political joke of the year.  These guys did not take her seriously then. 2010- now look at them – utterly blown away by this conservative power house pitbull, momma grizzly in lipstick and heels.

One could leave it at the conservative Palin naysayers.  Seeing Bill O’Reilly and Krauthammer succumb to Palin power is satisfying on its own merit.

BUT when “Tweety” Chris “Obama sends a tingle up my leg” Matthews of MSNBC covers the “Palin factor” , something is obviously knocking at the door of the consciousness of Obamabots. Mathews admitted that Palin had some serious political mojo going on.  Of course he had to be what we expected of MSNBC- a media sophomoric putz. He  had toturn a mere Palin robo call  into an occasion to racebait.

Wow Chris, so you just have to call Barry “President Obama”  or you are not being respectful enough.

Funny, how many times was George W. Bush just called  “Dub-ya”  or just “BUSH”?

Love the MSM double standard. Mind you, these are these same pundits that refused to call Sarah by her rightful title of”governor” yet she must call King Barry- President Obama.

Thanks to those who hate her, Sarah is quite fortunate in that the scandals and controversy pre-existed the wonderful legend she was to become.

Bristol is now pushing abstinence.  “Trooper Gate” went down like a brink in swimming pool of liberal sharks by accomplishing absolutely NOTHING but a waste of taxpayer dollars. Katy Couric is still pathetic…Tina Fey still putting her bony flat butt on the cover of any magazine that will have her.

Yep, taking a look in Sarah’s  dead bug covered rear view mirror  proves that the past effects of Palin derangement syndrome never put a some much as a  hink in her armor.  Bugs hit the window shield and they wipe off.

You knock Sarah down, she gets back up.

You push her, she pushes back harder.

And sorry PUMA sisters but I have to say that Sarah gets back on her feet with a lot less scare tissue than Hillary Clinton.

Nothing against Hillary. I love her, I supported her. There were times when I have been worried about her.  There are times when I have been disappointed…Okay really disappointed. Like I did not want her to support Barack Obama disappointed and I did not want her to become Secretary of State disappointed.

Diplomatic moves yes.

Smart moves?  In my opinion, not so much.

Again there are times when I am worried about Hillary.

But never Sarah.

Sarah is the child that a mother leaves in the sandbox with three bullies knowing that she will exit that box with at least two right hooks under her belt, some other kid’s  baseball cards and a magnificent sandcastle left behind.

Sarah is the one that makes seemingly crazy decisions and you think “Are you crazy?” .  However, you know that it would work for her and only her.

Sarah is quite a rarity in the political arena.  As a maverick, John McCain is somewhat of a paper tiger.  Sarah Palin on the other hand is the real thing.  She beat her own co-nominee at his own game.  Now she is the person that John McCain goes to for help.

Ordinarily, you would never think that the person -the man on the top of the ticket would have to beg favors from the woman in the #2 spot.  But then again this is Sarah Palin we are talking about.

Who created this star? Where did she come from? After nearly two years of bashing Sarah, the liberal mainstream media wants to know. They blame the GOP, the RNC, John McCain, Satan, even themselves. From what source of evil did this conservative she devil spawn?

From this article in The Nation:

How the Media Created a Monster: Sarah Palin

Greg Mitchell

August 22, 2010

It’s often said these days that Sarah Palin is a “media creation.” That is, the media promote and elevate her as one of America’s most popular and influential leaders, even though her approval ratings remain in the tank, by covering every appearance and statement (whether speech or tweet) as if she is the Junior President from Alaska.

But the “creation” part goes well beyond what’s happened since the 2008 campaign to keep her constantly in the public eye. It’s my view that she was created by the media even before John McCain picked her as his Veep candidate.It fact, it was exactly two years ago this week that a true (if rarely recognized) turning point in the 2008 race for the White House arrived. It came at the Democratic convention in Denver. No, it was not the good vibes about Obama, the ringing speeches by Teddy Kennedy, Michelle Obama, Bill and Hill, or by the candidate himself.

Rather, it was the electronic media’s overblown coverage of the allegedly widespread threat by female Hillary delegates, and other Clinton fans, to bolt Obama in favor of McCain that November.

As you may recall, the dissidents, known as “PUMAs,” got massive face time on TV and, it was claimed by many in the media, represented just the tip of the iceberg. And it was also said (by commentators, not just by the new, pro-Hillary media stars) that women, particularly older ones and suburban/blue-collar types who had voted for Hillary in the primaries, would likely abandon the Democrats in November.

Ok, back up a moment. My cougar ears have perked up.
Is this journalist somewhat, maybe a tiny bit attributing PUMAs  with the birth of conservative superstar Sarah Palin?  Okay she is after all a woman and PUMA does advocate for the involvement of women in top political positions  such as president or vice president.  I also recall fond memories of my PUMA sisters being very supportive of Sarah during those awful California Halloween effigy days and (shudder) the “Sarah Palin is a CUNT” tee shirt epidemic.
Regardless of political party affiliation, all women should be against the party of DICK.
No woman running for political office should ever be treated the way Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin were in 2008.
By party of DICK, I am not speaking of Richard “Dick” Nixon – not the Republican party- but the cold hard testosterone producing  machine that is the PATRIARCHY.  I am not telling women who are Democrats to vote for Republican women or vice versa.
I am saying that all women should support a woman’s right to run for office without being sexually demeaned by her opponents or the media.  What does it mean when liberal woman stand around a picnic table laughing at the ‘dumb conservative ” woman?  It means that you are condoning the sexist and discriminatory behavior.
It should come then as no shock when soon the high heel will be on the other well manicured political party foot.

Therefore, I agree with the article. PUMA may have been a factor in the Sarah Palin equation. PUMA is the organization that drove this idea home to the minds of women everywhere.   Yes PUMAs are liberals for the most part but they are patriots for embracing a woman whose political values differed so much from their own.  That applies myself- a conservative PUMA and it also applies to Sarah Palin, Kaye Bailey Hutchinson and several other Republican women.

The article continues:

...There was no firm evidence for this, of course, and few pundits, on TV or in print, seemed to notice that the same handful of disgruntled Hillary delegates appeared on all of the shows. No matter. Obama’s possible defeat because of the possible defections was widely predicted.

Why did this end up making any difference, since the mass female defections never happened?

Because John McCain and his people bought it, hook, line and sinker. This explains the sudden (though often ill-explained) rise of Sarah Palin to the top of their VP list. The McCainites saw an opening, which really wasn’t there, and went completely overboard. Not only did a female VP suddenly look like a great idea, but she would have extra appeal to the particular type of Hillary primary voters so hyped by the media.

The preposterous media coverage of the (few) unhappy Hillaryites at the Dem convention—which was aimed not at helping Obama but maintaining interest in the affair and the coming campaign—inspired McCain to select as his running mate someone who would virtually destroy his campaign.

Recall that after months of trailing, McCain came out of his convention with a bump that led to at least a tie with Obama in the polls—then he plummeted very quickly as the truth about Palin seeped out. In addition, he had lost his chief calling card: an edge in experience on Obama. A week after the GOP convention ended, polls were already showing that, if anything, women thought less of Palin than did men.  CNN’s survey, for example, gave Obama a 50% to 36% edge over McCain, with only 13% of women saying they were more likely to vote for him because of Palin — and 11% reporting they were now less likely.

And surveys later showed that while she drew crowds she actually drove more people away from the GOP than toward it. In fact, it’s a myth that Palin was broadly “popular.”

Imagine if McCain had picked even a neutral figure such as a Pawlenty or, say, Kay Bailey Hutchison. Yes, Obama still would have won (he ran a fine campaign and the economy collapsed). But if McCain hadn’t picked Palin, it might have been a real nail biter.

Also: Sarah Palin would still be a little-known political figure probably completing her first term as governor and with no boomlet for her as a candidate for president in 2012. And Tina Fey would have missed out on another career boost.

Hmmmm, not so sure that I concur with the last bit which implies that Sarah Palin owes her exposure to John McCain. Nor am I convinced that McCain chose Sarah because he saw unhappy Democrat women during Hillary Clinton’s loss to Obama for the DNC presidential nomination.  Again with the patriarchy. We also see this meme with RNC Chairman Michael Steel. Liberals claim that he was only voted as chairman because he was black and so was Obama.

Liberals…So racially tolerant and empowering of the little people.

Only in  liberal bizarro world would, Sarah Palin, the Alaskan hayseed only be chosen  for the RNC VP spot because she was a woman. Yet somehow is now a monster to those same liberals-  a monster created by the media.

Speaking of media creations, what about Barry Obama?  You know, the President who looks in the mirror and teleprompter too much.  You want to tell me that he is not a monster created by the media?

A woman can’t just be talented- some guy has to be responsible for it.   Sarah could have ran with McCain and been as engaging as driftwood.  Only Sarah, made that election what it was.   Also laughable is the author’s conclusion that the controversy surrounding Sarah, kept the election from being a “real nail biter”.   Ha!!! McCain would have been easily defeated by Obama with more votes had Sarah not been on the RNC ticket.  Even Ann Coulter, a notorious conservative and RINO hater, admitted that she voted for Sarah Palin and not John McCain.   There are also a bunch of conservatives that pinched their noses and voted for Sarah because unlike McCain, she was a real conservative- the only one on the ticket.

Take my advice liberals.  Don’t affirm to lies you do not believe in.  Sarah is all conservative woman and she fits the universal definition of politically unstoppable.  You tried once, twice, thrice.

Even when liberals stalk her, she just keeps being the same likable Sarah.

Now if that were me, I would have that creepy stalker drinking jet fuel before he could say Air Alaska but Sarah handled him easily while remaining calm.

Keeping it real.

And after encountering someone as phony as Barack Obama- keeping it real is enough for me and obviously many voters.  I don’t care if she reads Highlights for kids everyday and he reads the Economist.  If it ain’t real, if it’s one dimensional if someone’s wife has to say that you “deigned” to go into politics – you are not fit to be my president.

Go Sarah.  I always had faith in you.

Autographed Letter Signed,

AFROCITY

 

Notes from the Mirror-less Fitting Room: Feminism Dead in Apparent Murder-Suicide August 18, 2010

Clothes are a woman’s second skin.  For many girls, it does not matter if we are pro-life or hanging out at our local Planned Parenthood passing out the morning after pill- we like to look good.  Hillary and her sisterhood of traveling pantsuits.  Sarah Palin sporting a sassy pair of heels during her VP debate against Joe Biden (those heels looked good buried in his ass by the way).  Michelle Malkin, always the stylish conservative.  So I am told, Condi Rice has a shoe collection to die for.  And there is Michelle Obama who mixes organic arugula and J. Crew sensibility with liberal platitudes and $500 Lanvin tennis shoes.

The point I am making is that women like to shop.  Clothes are clothes right?  Vegans and environmentalists aside, you don’t have to be a stark raving libertarian to appreciate a beautiful women Bottega Veneta classic brown leather bag.

When it comes to shopping, girls check their political differences at the fitting room door.

Or so I thought.

On a recent visit to Manhattan, I made a stop at one of my favorite and most physically debilitating stores- Century 21.   I was in pursuit of  off season designer bargains.  What I got instead was a nose full of dust and pathogens- possibly from the British tourists that sneezed in my face and a bruised shoulder.

The best thing about Century 21 is its endless plethora of cool stuff from clothes, to handbags, lingerie, hats, hosiery.  The worse thing about Century 21 is its uncanny ability to demonstrate the worst behavior demonstrated by women since Seinfield’s  Elaine had a meltdown over the Today Sponge.

To see women in our most primitive state, simply walk into the Century 21 on Cortlandt Street in NYC.  The best seats in the house are on the third floor where the high end designer stuff lies in waiting to be grabbed, snagged, and bagged.

Because I have not lived in New York since 2007, I had to proceed carefully.  Not that Chicago women lack the tenacity of New York’s top shopping barracudas.  It is just that we tend not to kick a fellow woman’s  ass over a once heavily sequined Dolce and Gabanna  thong that has been tried on by hundreds of fat sweaty tourists.   Chicago women reserve their energy for deflecting random bullets from drive by shootings and grabby corrupt politicians.  After all, what good is a sequined thong in the dead of  a Midwestern winter when the coroner must peel it off your rigor mortissed ass for any evidence of sexual assault?  What a waste.   Jockey cotton thongs are more practical and mass produced just for girls like us.   Having said that, I now found my Jockey strapped butt in Century 21 after a two year absence.

Afrocity was somewhat afraid that she lost her bitchy spidey senses.  However this was put to rest once I hit some Russian speaking woman in the face with my big shopping bag with the sharp corners…by accident of course.  Somehow I just lose all sense of balance when I am standing next to a person that shoves all of the clothes on a rack to one side…WHILE I AM STILL LOOKING AT THEM.  Sounds of screeching hangers give me the willies.  I can’t be responsible for stomping my foot on the back of that white Chanel gown you meant to try on later and possibly wear tonight…Yes TONIGHT.

…So many clothes so little time and money. Speaking of money, the sound of foreign language in the store expressed one of my concerns about the declining American dollar. The Euro shoppers were clobbering us Betsy Ross dwellers.  Every time I picked up something I liked , I had to look at the price tag first, subtract it from my checking account,  and decided if I loved the item enough to starve to death until payday and use substandard non clumping cat litter.  My kitties do not dig Johnny Cat no matter how cool their owner looks in the Jil Sander blouse.   Afrocity for the sake of your cats, put the blouse down and walk away.

Within an hour, I was exhausted and walking around in circles with the same tunic and skinny jeans in my arms.  Once I determined that my time was more valuable than clawing my way though piles of clothes arranged on the floor and atop the heads of stroller bound toddlers,  my exit strategy went into effect.   Try on, pay up and get out.    However, I was about to have my hopes of an easy out dashed when the sound of quibbling stopped me dead in my tired from high heeled sandals foot tracks.

“Fuck you Bitch!”  a very tall black women yelled at an Indian woman.

The Indian woman was with a girl who was possibly her daughter.

The site of the conflict was a pair of Seven For All  Mankind jeans on sale for $10.99.

Let’s remember that the desires and motives of a fashionista goes beyond race, ethnicity or political ideology.

“You better take your hands off my fuckin’ jeans before you need a mosque up in this bitch.”

Laughter erupted from a small group of Southern tourists.  I could tell they were from the South due to their accents and proclivity to grab all of the Lily Pulitzer items they could find. The “Arizona Rocks” tee shirt one was wearing was a dead give away that they were NOT LIBERALS.   Which in New York City is a sin.

Eyes rolled at the Southern Belles.   Oh shit.  I feel a plane incoming.

I will pause from the action for a moment to mention that Century 21 is very close to Ground Zero in a number of ways in terms of both proximity and symbolically.  Some of fashions greatest “final sale wars” have been fought here.  Women have morally died on this sacred shopping ground.  Strangely once you depart the store and step outside,  Ground Zero is starring you in the face.

Century 21 store in Manhattan, near Ground Zero.

Mirroring the current debate over the building of a mosque near ground zero has nothing to do with fashion but in this case, the lust over a pair of jeans somehow was transformed into a political insult.   Before I could say Tandoori Chicken and Junior’s Cheesecake,  fuzz began to fly as the women grabbed at the jeans back and forth in a tug of war.  Where is Solomon when you need him? Threaten to cut the damn jeans in half and see who loves them more.

“Don’t bring the mosque into it,”  said a voice.  My eyes scanned the clothing racks and it was some dowdy “I am waiting for my teenage kid to try on everything in this store type” -a back to school shopping causality among the Marc Jacobs new fall arrival section.

I gave her a mean look but somehow that did not register with the brawl groupie because she continued to say stupid things.  “Who let in the Tea Party pro-life  racists  Sarah Palin’s over there?” the woman said gesturing towards the once laughing southerners.

And therein lies my problem with liberal women. The root of all evil begins and ends with Sarah Palin.  The root of all conflict begins and ends with abortion.  Make accusations and name call first, ask questions never.

Protect federal funds for education??? Can you say school vouchers?

Can someone explain to me why every so called feminist attempt to bring down Sarah Palin results in a murder-suicide for all womankind?  Liberal women shoot Sarah Palin and conservative women. Liberal women in turn make all women look stupid and catty thus murdering our potential for political strength.  Men will divide and conquer- always.  Hillary Clinton’s  race against Obama proved this.  Sure some women were mad and did not like Obama as the presidential nominee but what happened?  Katy Couric, the MSM used women against women.  Sarah Palin, the liberal deemed CUNT was used to scare women back into the arms of Obama.

As women we all have vaginae ..right? That does not mean that we always have to agree on everything.

Anyway, the southern women may have been liberals who voted Obama yet their laughter over the mosque comment and Arizona Rocks tee shirt excluded them from any inclusion in the feminists girls club.  You are like Sarah- the Mama grizzly Grinch who stole healthcare, mosques, abortion, and anything else that liberal feminists apparently stand for. Meanwhile the men stand around and watch our political cat fights.  Laughing at us, laugh fight, demean and tear down each other.

Perhaps a birth control pill flavored smoothie is appropriate at this time.  Stop the fighting. Feel the love and restricted reproduction. But alas, before we could break out the blender and soy milk,  a male store manager arrived on the scene to pull the women apart.

Afrocity took one look at the line for the fitting room and sighed.  Off went her clothes right in the middle of the store.  Yep, I tried on the jeans in public.  The mirror-less fitting room.  This was my tiny contribution towards the dying sad sound of a woman’s dignity.  Cellulite beginnings  and all,  Afrocity squeezed into the 29 waist skinny jeans only to feel like a sardine marinated in patriarchal snake oil.  Fuck this.

I threw down the jeans and tunic, running down the escalator to my sanity, guarding the contents of my checking account like a momma grizzly bear.  I will not spend one conservative dime in this feminist burial ground zero.

Autographed Letter Signed,

AFROCITY

 

Keith Olberman: An Obamabot Cartoon Flip Flop Book February 17, 2010

It is not easy to reconcile with many of the things said about and done to Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin during the 2008 presidential campaign season. Especially when for the latter, the verbal assault continues on her as well as her children.

It is interesting that I never, never liked the Family Guy long before Sarah Palin came on the political scene. Friends would chide me all of the time about missing “that great show” that was “..even better than Beevis and Butthead and South Park“.   Truthfully as a matter of personal taste, I am just not that into dysfunctional family animation.  The Simpsons is rarely watched in my home and the same goes for South Park.  While dysfunctional family animation shows are to be credited with memorable characters like Homer Simpson, “Man Bear Pig” and are canonized in popular culture, my own life was overrun by a “duh-oh” mother and an absent father.  Young Afrocity could have channeled the frustrated Lisa Simpson., young gifted and black among the mom with a GED. No thanks,  I don’t need  see my life replayed on television in claymation, animation, or otherwise.  I am sure the same goes for Sarah Palin.

The liberation of Hillary Clinton from the sharp tongued Obamabots came only after her decision to campaign for Barry.  Do as we say and the liberal attacks will go away.  Remember this little anti-Hillary gem  from MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann?

Olbermann was one of those Hillary haters that emphasized racism on the part of the Clintons at every turn. Hillary should be taken to a room “where only he comes out”.

Now fast forward to 2010 and Olbermann has somehow inherited Hillary love from the purple gods of Kool-Aid mountain, especially when it comes to invalidating Sarah Palin.

Oh, no you don’t Keith ol’ buddy, ol’ pal.  Can I say that this clip was the most contrived and homespun bullshit piece of journalism I have ever seen in my life.  How dare he infer that Hillary Clinton nuanced anything about Sarah Palin being a flash in the political pan with her response to the rather ….stupid question asked of her?  Furthermore, Keith Olberman failed to air Hillary’s full response to the young man. A response that was delivered with the precision grace and class that we all expect from a Secretary of State.

Shame on you Mr. Unfair and Unbalanced Keith Olbermann. You will never spin Hillary Clinton’s words into vitriol for Sarah Palin.

Autographed Letter Signed,

AFROCITY

 

Diversity Fatigue Friday: The Past Makes Imperfect Sense February 12, 2010

Are you at all surprised by anything that is occurring with the Obama administration? Did you expect things to be worse or better than they have turned out to be? In my case, I suppose that I expected pretty much what we experiencing now but to a lesser extent. Sure, Obama’s failure can be food for the conservative’s soul however, what does all of this really say about the future of politics in America? We elected an empty Ivy League educated suit, for the second time or perhaps third or even fourth. For some, electing Obama was a break from the crusty old white men of POTUS yesteryear. But how big a break was it? However illegitimate the liberals suspicions of racism on the part of voters against Barack Obama, we must acknowledge that our country fell for the bait and elected a man because of what was on the outside rather than the inside. For many, Obama’s election was a historic moment, a black man in office…FINALLY!!! But at what cost? Even as some liberals begin to mildly criticize the Obama administration, they remain loyal to the “we elected the right man” meme. They remain loyal to man that promised change and jobs.

The unfolding truth of President Obama, does little to confirm their fantasies.

You got your man, a black man, and that is exactly what you voted for. The Tea Party Movement has developed in large measure as not only a revolt against the Obama administration and Washington insiders but hopfully also the way we elect these people to our highest offices. Who says that our president always has to come from an Ivy League university? Possess a law degree and a penis?

There are many ways in which we could be diverse in choosing our elected officials. Color and sex does not have to be one of them.
Yes, Sarah Palin is a woman and it would indeed have been a historic moment if John McCain had won the presidency. Her vagina was not her only claim to diversity. There was those kids, and that “provincial” world view that drove the liberals crazy.

She didn’t go to school in the right places or wear the right clothes. When she did wear the right clothes, she was accused of spending too much money on them.

When it comes to choosing our president many Americans  propose that they do not desire Washington insiders. They claim to be anti-establishment, against the status quo.  But how can you aspire to be against the norm in Washington when you voted for Barack Obama?  He was the same Ivy League, lobbyist coddling, slick, Washington insider as the rest of them…only he can in a darker variety.

So much for true diversity.

For your viewing pleasure is this classic clip from an episode of  70’s Norman Lear sitcom, The Jeffersons.  Here characters George Jefferson and Tom Willis grapple with whether or not they should vote for a candidate because of his skin color.

Autographed Letter Signed,

AFROCITY


 

Sunday Soliloquy: What Say You Sarah? Who’s Your Founding Daddy Now? January 17, 2010

Keen to maximize on  Sarah Palin’s first week as a commentator on FOX News, the folks at MSNC morning show polished up on the illustrated art and craft of hating the former Alaska governor. They watched her FOX appearances and dissect her answers like Jack Ripper performing a Pap smear exam on Annie Chapmann.

While appearing on the Glenn Beck Program, Sarah Palin was asked by Beck which was her favorite founder as in “Founding Fathers”.

Beck:  Who’s your favorite Founder?

Palin: You know, well, all of them, because they came collectively together with so much–“

Beck: Bullcrap

Palin: –so much diverse and so much diversity in terms of belief, but collectively they came together — and they were led by, of course George Washington, so he’s got to rise to the top.

This video clip of Glenn Beck and Bill O’Reilly includes the exchange between Beck and Palin:

Before I address Sarah Palin’s answer to Glenn Beck’s question, can I just say that I am sick to death of every mainstream media outlet becoming the couch potato psychologist for Sarah Palin. The last thing we need is FOX News doing it as well.  Sorry Bill-O, I do not agree with your characterization of Sarah’s answer to Glenn Beck as being a cop out. However,  I  do agree with your assessment of  the idiots at MSNBC’s “Morning Joe”.

As we all know, bashing Sarah Palin is a life sustaining vehicle for MSNBC. Many terms in the lexicon of Palin hating moonbats derive from Keith Olbermann and his bottom feeder colleagues.

Of course , the quality of  journalism at MSNBC always proves that there will never be a dearth of dim light bulbs. Ironically, karma being the wicked bitch of the west, in her attempt to  downplay the intelligence of Sarah Palin,  dumb ditz Mika Brzezinski proved to be the dimmest yellow journalism brick in the road..

Yes, she actually believed that Abraham Lincoln was a Founding Father. Bill you gave Mika far too much credit.  Mika was not joking. I believe that she actually and truly thought that Abraham Lincoln was a Founding Father. The average American cannot name the framers of the constitution. They believe that it is anyone whose face is carved on Mount Rushmore, hence  idiot  Mika from MSNBC naming Abraham Lincoln.

Two of these men are not Founding Fathers, come on can you tell which ones???

Getting back to Sarah Palin’s answer to Glenn Beck.  I was fine with her answer as it  has some valid points. Why are we consumed as a society with ranking things?  The question in itself was along the lines of Katie Couric’s “What magazines do you read?” .  Next they will ask Sarah who is her favorite  character or what famous serial killer does she admire the most.

“oh golly gee Glenn, I choose Theordore Bundy because he was a Republican.”

This is NOT a Founding Father

I can only imagine the irritation Sarah Palin feels whenever questions of this type enter an interview.  Any answer would have been the wrong one.  Had she named Thomas Jefferson as her favorite Founding Father, a nanosecond later the NAACP would claim she is a racist because Jefferson, who had more slaves than any, was known to have played “Ride Sally Ride” in the literal sense.  Had she named Hamilton, Rachel Maddow would have went into the meta-ethics of that answer.

Sarah’s utterance  “all of them” was a safe bet.  She is right. Founding Fathers …plural…as a collective body.

After all they are all important and she would have been slammed regardless of any answer she gave. When it comes to rabid liberals, Sarah Palin is the consummate conservative bitch in heat. You can’t put protective panties on that booty.

The liberals idea of Palin Hood

In the video clips of Beck and O’Reilly,  you see a mention or two of  Founding Fathers- Jefferson, Washington, or Hamilton.  Let’s reverse a common practice here and name fathers who are long neglected in the extensive musings  and cannons of “great American  men”.  How about John Jay? James Madison? John Adams?   Adams was hardly ever mentioned until his resurgence to popularity thanks to HBO and Paul Giamatti.

How unfortunate that it took a mini-series  to finally give John Adams some historical credit within our collective memory. Adams personality and appearance being not as magnetic and attractive as Jefferson’s or Washington’s, force his legacy to suffer from our nation’s tendency towards selective amnesia.  Now he is “cool” again.  Wow, Laura Linney played his wife dude.

What about Benjamin Franklin? You know the guy who invented bifocals and created this famous  political cartoon:

If anyone asks Afrocity, which Founding Father her my favorite, you know what she will say?

“All of them”

You betcha!

Autographed Letter Signed,

AFROCITY

 

 
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